A recently received letter and some photos from our Dear Professor...
(or: Live Feed Straight from the Well-Fed, Still Alive, Perry F. Mills)
(or: Live Feed Straight from the Well-Fed, Still Alive, Perry F. Mills)
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE(Pending spelling corrections and change of font)
News Update, New Year 2008!
(Material to be Typed in by a Non-Robot)
After four years of being savaged by sheep, the excised professor bakes zucchini loaf and brandishes a spatula!
Local judicial rulings indicated that the processes stifling this loudmouth were illegal, but it was O.K. with the good old boys downtown, so the egregious suspension was affirmed.
This will be glad news to the State Supreme Court, who will be reviewing this mess shortly. Since no one wants to hear the aggrieved tales from the victim, it's a bit of a guess what is being judged all round....
Perhaps moving the inquiry to a venue in which the evidence is heard by folks who aren't related to the participants will allow a little law and justice to creep in.
Stay tuned for more of the same....
3 comments:
I don't understand. What are these photos of the beast marching about the world, concocting zucchini loaf and wielding a spatula? Where are the chains and manacles?
Oh, they're there, don't you worry. The Redbreasted Grizzly has special tufts of fur, and a nearly impervious layer of blubber, designed specifically to conceal bindings, blinders, clasps, and gags. But they haven't vanished entirely...
Perry: I see you are alive and kicking in Bellingham. I stumbled on your blog by accident, but the story of your travails with authority persuade me that you are indeed my former classmate from Ilwaco H.S.
Liz nee Sundstrom
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